I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
