I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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