What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
