just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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