at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
