I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
