So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
