ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
