there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
