It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
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I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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