garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
