wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize