i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
