Duck Duck Cougar?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.