I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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