ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have aggressive nipples.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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