I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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