ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize