Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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