3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
