did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
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