the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
