Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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