you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Success! We fucked roommates!
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
