I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize