I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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