Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
