Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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