He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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