i barfeds in our rink
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize