Can Purell be used as lube?
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
someone owes me an orgasm
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
