make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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