oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
