We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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