I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
These tits shall not be calmed
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
