Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
