So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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