Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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