i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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