Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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