Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Man, jail baloney is awful.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.