My nipple is on Facebook.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
