jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
