But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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