He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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