i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
