so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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