I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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