we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Do you have feelings for this penis?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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