My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
